jamal suliman lovers
مرحبا بالسادة الزوار يسرنا إنضمامكم لمنتدى النجم العربى الكبير جمال سليمان



 
الرئيسيةcoolpageدخولموقع محبى جمال سليمانالتسجيلاليوميةمكتبة الصورس .و .جبحـثالأعضاءالمجموعات

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 قصص و فكاهة بالانجليزية.

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مُساهمةموضوع: Little girl with Grandpa   الثلاثاء 14 يوليو 2009, 10:02 pm

Little girl with Grandpa jocolor


A grandfather and granddaughter were sitting and talking when the young girl asked, "Did God make you, Grandpa?"

"Yes, God made me," the grandfather answered.

A few minutes later, the little girl asked him, "Did God make me too?" "Yes, He did," the older man answered.

For a few minutes, the little girl seemed to be studying her grandpa, as well as her own reflection in the mirror, while her grandfather wondered what was running through her mind.

At last she spoke up. "You know, Grandpa," she said,

"God's doing a lot better job
lately."

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مُساهمةموضوع: The Cart Horse & The Donkey   الثلاثاء 21 يوليو 2009, 6:39 am

study
The Cart Horse & The Donkey




Once upon a time there were two cart-horses. They worked together for many years, pulling the cart of a peasant. Over the years, they often argued with each other, complaining that the other was not keeping to its side, or was going just a little too quickly or just a little too slow.




One day, one of the two horses suddenly died.





The remaining horse was very upset about this.





It realized that in all the time that they had worked together, it had not once told the other horse how much it valued its company and its faithful help in pulling the cart. Now the chance was gone forever.





The horse also reflected on all the squabbles they had had. It suddenly understood that it need not have taken offence as easily as it had done, that it need not have borne as many grudges, that it could have been less arrogant, in short, it realized that it had wasted all the energy that had been available for friendship and kindness on unworthy and unnecessary thoughts and emotions.





The horse was ashamed and resolved to lead a different life in future. Whoever its new partner was going to be, things were going to be different.





But time passed, and the horse forgot. One day, it caught itself in exactly the same kind of behavior that it had sworn never to engage in again.





The horse could not understand why it had returned to its old ways.





That evening, in the stable, the horse decided to seek out the peasant's donkey, which had a reputation for wisdom among the animals.





The donkey listened to the horse's story. Eventually, it replied. "It is good that you have noticed what has happened. If you truly want to change, this is possible; but it will, for a long time, cost you your peace of mind. Are you prepared to accept this?"





The horse replied that it definitely did not want to return to its old ways. Anything was better than that.





So the donkey continued, "There is one very simple, and at the same time very hard thing that you have to do. Remember every day that one day, perhaps today, perhaps many years from now, you will die.




Remember every day that the horse next to you will die.



Remember every day that every other creature you will see, will one day die.



Remember that all animals alive today are part of a wave, which will soon break and be lost on the beach forever, to be followed by a new wave, and another, and another.



No wave is permanent. The only thing that is permanent is the ocean."




There were tears in the horse's eyes.





The donkey continued, "Only if you remember death will you become strong-willed and alert enough not to postpone love. This is my advice to you, and in following it, perhaps one day you may come to know that which is deathless."

الرجوع الى أعلى الصفحة اذهب الى الأسفل
معاينة صفحة البيانات الشخصي للعضو
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مُساهمةموضوع: 21st Century....   الجمعة 07 أغسطس 2009, 4:39 am



21st Century.... jocolor
Our communication - Wireless

Our dress - Topless

Our telephone - Cordless

Our cooking - Fireless

Our youth - Jobless

Our food - Fatless


Our labour - Effortless

Our conduct - Worthless

Our relation - Loveless

Our attitude - Careless

Our feelings - Heartless

Our politics - Shameless

Our education - Valueless

Our follies - Countless

Our arguments - Baseless

Our Job - Thankless

Our Boss - Brainless

Our Salary
- Very less

*******




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معاينة صفحة البيانات الشخصي للعضو
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مُساهمةموضوع: English Language   الأحد 09 أغسطس 2009, 8:45 pm

English Language Very Happy jocolor



Let's face it - English is a crazy language.

In what other language do people drive in a parkway and park in a driveway?

Why does night fall but never break and day break but never fall?

Why is it that when we transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when we transport something by ship, it's called cargo?

Why are people who ride motorcycles called bikers and people who ride bikes called cyclists?

In what other language do thay call the third hand on the clock the second hand?

Why is it called a TV set when you get only one?


Why - in our crazy language - can your nose run and your feet smell?

Sometimes you have to believe that all English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane:

If olive oil is made of olives, what do they make baby oil from?

If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian consume?

A writer is someone who writes, and a stinger is something that stings.

But fingers don't fing and grocers don't groce.

If the plural of tooth is teeth, shouldn't the plural of booth be beeth?

If the teacher taught, why isn't it also true that the preacher praught?

If harmless actions are the opposite of harmful actions, why are shameless and shameful behavior the same?

English is a language in which you can turn a light on and you can turn a light off and you can turn a light out, but you can't turn a light in;

In which the sun comes up and goes down, but prices go up and come down.

In which your nose can simultaneously burn up and burn down and your car can slow up and slow down, in which you can fill in a form by filling out a form and in which your alarm clock goes off by going on.

English is a crazy language. What is it that when the sun or the moon or the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible?; and why when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I wind up this essay
, I shall end it?



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مُساهمةموضوع: sunday school   الثلاثاء 11 أغسطس 2009, 5:04 am



sunday school Very Happy
Little Mary was not the best student in Sunday School. Usually she slept through the class. One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, ''Tell me, Mary, who created the universe?''




When Mary didn't stir, little Johnny, an altruistic boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. ''God Almighty !'' shouted Mary and the teacher said, ''Very good'' and Mary fell back to sleep.

A while later the teacher asked Mary, ''Who is our Lord and Savior?'' But Mary didn't even stir from her slumber.


Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. ''Jesus Christ!'' shouted Mary and the teacher said, ''Very good,'' and Mary fell back to sleep. Then the teacher asked Mary a third question, ''What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?'' And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin.

This time Mary jumped up and shouted, ''If you stick that damn thing in me one more time, I'll break it in half!'' The Teacher fainted.






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مُساهمةموضوع: Dog Logic   الثلاثاء 18 أغسطس 2009, 11:18 pm

Dog Logic jocolor confused


The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue. - Anonymous

There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face. - Ben Williams

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than heloves himself. - Josh Billings

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person. - Andy Rooney

Dogs love their friends & bite their enemies, quite unlike people, who are incapable of pure love & always have to mix love & hate. - Anonymous

Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog. - Franklin P. Jones

If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise- Unknown

My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3.00 a can. That's almost $21.00 in dog money.- Joe Weinstein

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man. - Mark Twain

Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole. - Roger Caras

If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then give him only two of them. - Phil
Pastoret

*******

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معاينة صفحة البيانات الشخصي للعضو
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مُساهمةموضوع: Missing Wife   الجمعة 04 سبتمبر 2009, 12:52 am



Missing Wife Very Happy Very Happy
A
man calls into the police station and says, "My wife is missing."

The officer asks, "How long has she been gone?"

"A month."

"Why did you wait so long to report it?"

"Well, until yesterday I thought it was just a dream, then I realized I didn't have any clean clothes to
wear."

*******


الرجوع الى أعلى الصفحة اذهب الى الأسفل
معاينة صفحة البيانات الشخصي للعضو
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مُساهمةموضوع: You Know you are having a bad day when...   الأربعاء 09 سبتمبر 2009, 10:18 am



You Know you are having a bad day when...

Your birthday cake collapses from the weight of the candles.

You call the suicide prevention hotline and they put you on hold.

Everyone avoids you the morning after the company office party.

The bird singing outside your window is a vulture.





You wake up and your braces are stuck together.

Your blind date turns out to be your ex-wife/husband.

You have to borrow from your Visa card to pay your MasterCard.

Nothing you own is actually paid for.

The Gypsy fortune teller offers to refund your money when she sees your future.

People think that you're 40 and you're only 25.

The doctor says you are in fine health for someone twice your age.

TRY TO HAVE A GOOD
DAY!

******
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مُساهمةموضوع: Cold water   الإثنين 14 سبتمبر 2009, 9:11 am

Cold water



A young man went to his grandfather's place to stay for the weekend. He was sitting down to lunch when he noticed that the spoons and forks were encrusted in a thin filmy substance.



He asked his grandfather,"Are you sure you washed it properly?"



"As clean as cold water can get it" was the reply.



So the young man shrugged and started eating.



The next day at breakfast he noticed that the plates were dirty and grimy. It also smelled a bit like dog.



Are you sure you washed it properly?"



"Clean as cold water can get it" was the reply again.



The man, a bit suspicious for his health, looked at his grandfather, than at his plate and started eating.



As he was leaving, his grandfather's dog jumped out in front of him, growled and generally blocked him from going forward.



"Cold water, leave the poor boy alone!" shouted the old man from inside.




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مُساهمةموضوع: Hospital Window ( story   الأربعاء 16 سبتمبر 2009, 9:51 pm



Hospital Window ( story


Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room.



One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs.
His bed was next to the room's only window.



The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back.



The men talked for hours on end. They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation.


Every afternoon when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window.


The man in the other bed began to live for those one hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside.


The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake. Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every color and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance.


As the man by the window described all this in exquisite detail, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine the picturesque scene.


One warm afternoon the man by the window described a parade passing by.


Although the other man couldn't hear the band - he could see it. In his mind's eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words.


Days and weeks passed.


One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep. She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away.


As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the window. The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone.


Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the real world outside. He strained to slowly turn to look out the window beside the bed.


It faced a blank wall.


The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful things outside this window.


The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall.


She said, "Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you."



Epilogue:


There is tremendous happiness in making others happy, despite our own situations.

Shared grief is half the sorrow, but happiness when shared, is doubled.

If you want to feel rich, just count all the things you have that money can't
buy.





الرجوع الى أعلى الصفحة اذهب الى الأسفل
معاينة صفحة البيانات الشخصي للعضو
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مُساهمةموضوع: If there's light in the soul   الجمعة 25 سبتمبر 2009, 6:54 am


If there's light in the soul


If there's light in the soul
There'll be beauty in the person.

If there's beauty in the person
There'll be harmony in the house.

If there's harmony in the house
There will be order in the nation.

If there's order in the nation
There'll be peace in the world.

Chinese Proverb

*******
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معاينة صفحة البيانات الشخصي للعضو
مايا
عضو بدرجة مشرف عام
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مُساهمةموضوع: رد: قصص و فكاهة بالانجليزية.   الجمعة 25 سبتمبر 2009, 11:11 am

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معاينة صفحة البيانات الشخصي للعضو http://www.emadmet3b.tk
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مُساهمةموضوع: رد: قصص و فكاهة بالانجليزية.   السبت 26 سبتمبر 2009, 6:21 am

thank you maia
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مُساهمةموضوع: Smile   السبت 26 سبتمبر 2009, 6:45 am

Smile

Smile, it is the key that fits the lock of everybody's heart.

A smile happens in a flash, but its memory can last a lifetime

There are hundreds of languages in the world, but a smile speaks them all

Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy

A warm smile is the universal language of kindness

Smiling makes you feel better about yourself, even if you don't feel like it. And it always makes other people think better of you.

A smile is a light in the window of a face that signifies the heart is at home and waiting

Life is like a mirror, we get the best results when we smile at it

You are never fully dressed until you wear a smile

A smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks

Beauty is power; a smile is its sword.

Keep smiling - it makes people wonder what you've been up to

Peace begins with a smile

Every tear has a smile behind it.

Keep a smile on your face and let your personality be your autograph

No matter how small, a SMILE on your face tells all

What sunshine is to flowers, smiles are to humanity

Smiles are unbreakable- -and mend broken hearts

Smiles are great investments: the more you collect, the better you feel

Be multilingual; smiles are the universal language

A laugh is a smile that bursts

A smile is just a frown upside-down

A smile is as nice to give, as it is to receive

Most smiles start with another smile...

Though Smile cannot erase our burden, but it sure does make us feel lighter...

Just smile
pleaseeeeeeee
الرجوع الى أعلى الصفحة اذهب الى الأسفل
معاينة صفحة البيانات الشخصي للعضو
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مُساهمةموضوع: Adam and God   الأربعاء 28 أكتوبر 2009, 6:52 am

Adam and God


After spending time with Eve, Adam was walking in the Garden with God. Adam told God how much the woman means to him and how blessed he feels to have her. Adam began to ask questions about her.

Adam: Lord, Eve is beautiful. Why did you make her so beautiful?

God: So you will always want to look at her.

Adam: Lord, her skin is so soft. Why did you make her skin so soft?

God: So you will always want to touch her.

Adam: She always smells so good. Lord, why did you make her smell so good?

God: So you will always want to be near her.

Adam: That's wonderful Lord, and I don't want to seem ungrateful, but why did you make her so stupid?

God: So she would love
you.


الرجوع الى أعلى الصفحة اذهب الى الأسفل
معاينة صفحة البيانات الشخصي للعضو
مايا
عضو بدرجة مشرف عام
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مُساهمةموضوع: رد: قصص و فكاهة بالانجليزية.   الإثنين 02 نوفمبر 2009, 10:52 am

الرجوع الى أعلى الصفحة اذهب الى الأسفل
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مُساهمةموضوع: رد: قصص و فكاهة بالانجليزية.   الإثنين 02 نوفمبر 2009, 9:28 pm

maia
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مُساهمةموضوع: The Cow & The Pig   السبت 07 نوفمبر 2009, 5:53 am

The Cow & The Pig



There was once a man who was very rich and very miserly at the same time. The villagers disliked him intensely. One day he said to them, "Either you're jealous of me or you don't understand my love of money-God alone knows. But you dislike me; that much I know. When I die, I won't take anything with me. I will leave it all for others. I will make a will, and I will give everything to charity. Then everyone will be happy."



Even then people mocked and laughed at him. The rich man said to them, "What is the matter with you? Can't you wait a few years to see my money go to charity?"



The villagers didn't believe him. He said, "Do you think I'm immortal? I'll die like everyone else, and then my money will go to charities." He couldn't understand why they didn't believe him.



One day he went for a walk. All of a sudden it started raining heavily, so he took shelter under a tree. Under this tree he saw a pig and a cow. The pig and the cow entered into conversation, and the man overheard what they were saying.



The pig said to the cow, "How is it that everybody appreciates you and nobody appreciates me? When I die, I provide people with bacon, ham and sausage. People can also use my bristles. I give three or four things, whereas you give only one thing: milk. Why do people appreciate you all the time and not me?"



The cow said to the pig, "Look, I give them milk while I'm alive. They see that I am generous with what I have. But you don't give them anything while you're alive. Only after you're dead do you give ham, bacon and so forth. People don't believe in the future; they believe in the present. If you give while you are alive, people will appreciate you. It is quite simple."



From that moment on, the rich man gave all he had to the
poor.


********
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معاينة صفحة البيانات الشخصي للعضو
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مُساهمةموضوع: God is in joking mood   الأحد 08 نوفمبر 2009, 6:29 am

God is in joking mood

A man was praying to god.


He said, "God?"


God responded, "Yes?"


And the Guy said, "Can I ask a question?"





"Go right ahead", God said.


"God, what is a million years to you?"


God said, "A million years to me is only a second."


The man wondered.


Then he asked, "God, what is a million dollars worth to you?"


God said, "A million dollars to me is a penny."


So the man said, "God can I have a penny?"


And God cheerfully said,


"Sure!....... just a
second."


i am sorry for this jok i got it from my yahoo e mail agen sooooooo sorry
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مُساهمةموضوع: Some thing u just cant Xplain...   السبت 14 نوفمبر 2009, 4:21 am

Some thing u just cant Xplain... A farmer is sitting in the neighborhood bar slowly getting drunk.

A man comes in and asks the farmer,

"Hey, why are you sitting here on this beautiful day getting drunk?





" The farmer says,

"Some things you just can't explain."

"So what happened that is so horrible?" the man asked.

The farmer then decides to try and answer,

"Well if you must know, today I was sitting by my cow milking her.

Just as I got the bucket about full,

she took her left leg and kicked it over."


That's not so bad, what's the big deal?"

The farmer says, "Some things you just can't explain."

"Try me" the man says.


The farmer relenting, continued

"I took her left leg and tied it to the post on the left with some rope.

Then I sat down and continued to milk her.

Just as I got the bucket about full

she took her right leg and kicked it over."


"Ok so 2 buckets of milk spilled. That still isn't that bad."

The farmer says, "Some things you just can't explain."


" So, what did you do then?"

the man asked, intrigued.


"I took her right leg and tied it to the post on the right.

I sat back down and continued to milk her,

and just as I got the bucket just about full,

the stupid cow knocked over the bucket with her tail."


"Wow, you must have been pretty upset!"

but that's no reason to just sit here getting all depressed."

The farmer says, "Some things you just can't explain."

"So then what else did you do?"

the man asked again. "

Well I didn't have any more rope,

so I took off my belt and tied her tail to the rafter.

That's when my pants fell down and my wife walked in.


"Like I said! Some things you just can't
explain."
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مُساهمةموضوع: 10 facts about dreams   الإثنين 23 نوفمبر 2009, 4:38 am

10 facts about dreams


10. Blind People Dream

People who become blind after birth can see images in their dreams. People who are born blind do not see any images, but have dreams equally vivid involving their other senses of sound, smell, touch and emotion. It is hard for a seeing person to imagine, but the body’s need for sleep is so strong that it is able to handle virtually all physical situations to make it happen.

9. You Forget 90% of your Dreams

Within 5 minutes of waking, half of your dream if forgotten. Within 10, 90% is gone. The famous poet, Samuel Taylor Coleridge, woke one morning having had a fantastic dream (likely opium induced) - he put pen to paper and began to describe his “vision in a dream” in what has become one of English’s most famous poems: Kubla Khan. Part way through (54 lines in fact) he was interrupted by a “Person from Porlock“. Coleridge returned to his poem but could not remember the rest of his dream. The poem was never completed.

8. Everybody Dreams

Every human being dreams (except in cases of extreme psychological disorder) but men and women have different dreams and different physical reactions. Men tend to dream more about other men, while women tend to dream equally about men and women. In addition, both men and women experience sexually related physical reactions to their dreams regardless of whether the dream is sexual in nature; males experience erections and females experience increased vaginal blood flow.

7. Dreams Prevent Psychosis

In a recent sleep study, students who were awakened at the beginning of each dream, but still allowed their 8 hours of sleep, all experienced difficulty in concentration, irritability, hallucinations, and signs of psychosis after only 3 days. When finally allowed their REM sleep the student’s brains made up for lost time by greatly increasing the percentage of sleep spent in the REM stage. [Source]

6. We Only Dream of What We Know

Our dreams are frequently full of strangers who play out certain parts - did you know that your mind is not inventing those faces - they are real faces of real people that you have seen during your life but may not know or remember? The evil killer in your latest dream may be the guy who pumped petrol in to your Dad’s car when you were just a little kid. We have all seen hundreds of thousands of faces through our lives, so we have an endless supply of characters for our brain to utilize during our dreams.

5. Not Everyone Dreams in Color

A full 12% of sighted people dream exclusively in black and white. The remaining number dream in full color. People also tend to have common themes in dreams, which are situations relating to school, being chased, running slowly/in place, sexual experiences, falling, arriving too late, a person now alive being dead, teeth falling out, flying, failing an examination, or a car accident. It is unknown whether the impact of a dream relating to violence or death is more emotionally charged for a person who dreams in color than one who dreams in black and white. [Source]

4. Dreams are not about what they are about

If you dream about some particular subject it is not often that the dream is about that. Dreams speak in a deeply symbolic language. The unconscious mind tries to compare your dream to something else, which is similar. Its like writing a poem and saying that a group of ants were like machines that never stop. But you would never compare something to itself, for example: “That beautiful sunset was like a beautiful sunset”. So whatever symbol your dream picks on it is most unlikely to be a symbol for itself.

3. Quitters have more vivid dreams

People who have smoked cigarettes for a long time who stop, have reported much more vivid dreams than they would normally experience. Additionally, according to the Journal of Abnormal Psychology: “Among 293 smokers abstinent for between 1 and 4 weeks, 33% reported having at least 1 dream about smoking. In most dreams, subjects caught themselves smoking and felt strong negative emotions, such as panic and guilt. Dreams about smoking were the result of tobacco withdrawal, as 97% of subjects did not have them while smoking, and their occurrence was significantly related to the duration of abstinence. They were rated as more vivid than the usual dreams and were as common as most major tobacco withdrawal symptoms.” [Source]

2. External Stimuli Invade our Dreams

This is called Dream Incorporation and it is the experience that most of us have had where a sound from reality is heard in our dream and incorporated in some way. A similar (though less external) example would be when you are physically thirsty and your mind incorporates that feeling in to your dream. My own experience of this includes repeatedly drinking a large glass of water in the dream which satisfies me, only to find the thirst returning shortly after - this thirst… drink… thirst… loop often recurs until I wake up and have a real drink. The famous painting above (Dream Caused by the Flight of a Bee around a Pomegranate a Second Before Awakening) by Salvador Dali, depicts this concept.

1. You are paralyzed while you sleep

Believe it or not, your body is virtually paralyzed during your sleep - most likely to prevent your body from acting out aspects of your dreams. According to the Wikipedia article on dreaming, “Glands begin to secrete a hormone that helps induce sleep and neurons send signals to the spinal cord which cause the body to relax and later become essentially paralyzed.”

Bonus: Extra Facts

1. When you are snoring, you are not dreaming.
2. Toddlers do not dream about themselves until around the age of 3. From the same age, children typically have many more nightmares than adults do until age 7 or 8.
3. If you are awakened out of REM (Rapid Eye Movement) sleep, you are more likely to remember your dream in a more vivid way than you would if you woke from a full night
sleep.
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مُساهمةموضوع: The donkey   الإثنين 14 ديسمبر 2009, 6:52 am

The donkey A village potter used to make pots and planters. He would go to a near by town to sell his wares. He had a donkey on whose back he would load the pots etc.

Diwali was fast approaching, so the potter decided to make some statues of Lord Ganesha and Goddess Lakshmi, to sell in town. He made some beautiful statues and painted them in bright colours. He then loaded them on to the back of his donkey and set off towards the city.

On the way, he crossed many people. They would invariably fold their hands and bow to the statues of Ganesha and Lakshmi. By the time they reached the city, many people had bowed their heads before the deities.


They reached the exhibition ground where the artisans could exhibit their things. Soon the potter was able to sell his statues for a good sum. He was pleased indeed!

The potter took his donkey by the muzzle and set off on the road leading back to the village. Every time they would cross anyone, the donkey would stop and preen himself prettily as if he were a model. But what was the matter! No one seemed to as much as glance at him! Why were people not bowing their heads before him anymore? Desperate to catch their attention, the donkey started to bray louder & louder...

He-haw, he-haw...... He went on. The passers-by started pelting stones at him in annoyance. The potter was bewildered too.

The poor donkey had thought that everyone was bowing to him, little realizing that their reverence was directed to the idols of God tied to his back and not to him!

Many of us make this mistake. A person occupying a seat of power, often finds people saluting him. If he thinks that the salutations are in his honour, he is living in a fool's paradise, like the donkey in the story!

The respect is given to the chair and not to the person occupying it. As soon as he steps down from the position, the people around him vanish.

Frogs croak only when it rains, as soon as the rain stops, they
vanish.

********
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مُساهمةموضوع: The Fish and the Turtle   الجمعة 25 ديسمبر 2009, 11:53 pm

The Fish and the Turtle



Once upon a time there was a fish. And just because it was a fish, it had lived all its life in the water and knew nothing whatever about anything else but water. And one day as it swam about in the lake where all its days had been spent, it happened to meet a turtle of its acquaintance who had just come back from a little excursion on the land.

"Good day, Mr. Turtle!" said the fish. "I have not seen you for a long time. Where have you been?"
"Oh", said the turtle, "I have just been for a trip on dry land."

"On dry land!" exclaimed the fish.
"What do you mean by on dry land? There is no dry land. I had never seen such a thing. Dry land is nothing."
"Well," said the turtle good-naturedly. "If you want to think so, of course you may; there is no one who can hinder you. But that's where I've been, all the same."

"Oh, come," said the fish. "Try to talk sense. Just tell me now what is this land of yours like? Is it all wet?"
"No, it is not wet," said the turtle. "Is it nice and fresh and cool?" asked the fish.
"No, it is not nice and fresh and cool," the trutle replied.
"Is it clear so that light can come through it?"
"No, it is not clear. Light cannot come through it."
"Is it soft and yielding, so that I can move my fins about in it and push my nose through it?"
"No, it is not soft and yielding. You could not swim in it."
"Does it move or flow in streams?"
"No, it neither moves nor flows in streams."
"Does it ever rise up into waves then, with white foams in them?" asked the fish, impatient at this string of Noes.
"No!" replied the turtle, truthfully. "It never rises up into waves that I have seen."


"There now," exclaimed the fish triumphantly. "Didn't I tell you that this land of yours was just nothing? I have just asked, and you have answered me that it is neither wet nor cool, not clear nor soft and that it does not flow in streams nor rise up into waves. And if it isn't a single one of these things what else is it but nothing? Don't tell me."

"Well, well", said the turtle, "If you are determined to think that dry land is nothing, I suppose you must just go on thinking so. But any one who knows what is water and what is land would say you were just a silly fish, for you think that anything you have never known is nothing just because you have never known it."

And with that the turtle turned away and, leaving the fish behind in its little pond of water, set out on another excursion over the dry land that was nothing.

*******


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مُساهمةموضوع: King of the jungle   الخميس 31 ديسمبر 2009, 3:51 am

[color:68c4=#000]King of the jungle



A lion woke up one morning feeling really rowdy and mean. He went out and cornered a small monkey and roared,



"Who is mightiest of all jungle animals?"




The trembling monkey says, "You are, mighty lion!




Later, the lion confronts a ox and fiercely bellows,



"Who is the mightiest of all jungle animals?"




The terrified ox stammers, "Oh great lion, you are the mightiest animal in the jungle!"




On a roll now, the lion swaggers up to an elephant and roars,



"Who is mightiest of all jungle animals?"




Fast as lightning, the elephant snatches up the lion with his trunk, slams him against a tree half a dozen times leaving the lion feeling like it'd been run over by a safari wagon.


The elephant then stomps on the lion till it looks like a corn tortilla and ambles away.




The lion lets out a moan of pain, lifts his head weakly and hollers after the elephant -



"Just because you don't know the answer, you don't have to get so upset about
it!"


*********
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مُساهمةموضوع: What's the difference   الجمعة 01 يناير 2010, 9:41 pm

What's the difference between an embassy and a consulate?

A consulate is like a junior embassy. It's generally located in a busy tourist city, and takes care of minor diplomatic tasks such as issuing visas.

The word consulate literally means office of the consul, who is a diplomat appointed to foster trade and take care of expatriates. You can read some pointed essays about the role of the modern day consulate at the American Foreign Service site.


Embassies are much bigger deals. The word embassy comes from the French ambassade, or office of the ambassador. Ambassadors are high-ranking diplomatic representatives who serve as spokespersons for their national governments.

If one country recognizes the sovereignty of another, they generally establish an embassy there. Embassies take care of the same administrative duties as consulates, but they also represent their governments abroad.


This can be tricky business. For instance, the United States doesn't maintain an embassy in Taiwan (in order to maintain diplomatic relations with China), but it does operates a consulate there to take care of its overseas citizens.

For an interesting online look at another prickly diplomatic relation, check out the U.S. Embassy in Malaysia, which features a reaction statement to the recent incarceration of Malaysia's former Deputy Prime Minister, Anwar Ibrahim.


You may recall the famous photograph from 1975 of American citizens ostensibly fleeing the American embassy in Saigon.

The building was in fact an apartment complex across the street, but the message was clear: once the embassy leaves, the country symbolically
leaves.
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